I like to think my ability to “mom” exists on a spectrum — the “mom continuum.” I have days where I feel like I have it all together. Lunches? Prepped. Laundry? Folded and put away. Dinner? Home cooked and delicious. Other days, to quote a favorite expression of my father, I feel like I am […]
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To help you, and to save pregnant feelings everywhere, I’ve come up with five things you should be ABSOLUTELY SAFE in saying to a pregnant woman.
My oldest daughter, soon to be 8 years old, sipped her hot cocoa thoughtfully, the white lights of our Christmas tree reflected in her dark blue eyes. She watched me wrestle awkwardly with the star on top. “You know what I really want this year?” ”What’s that?” I asked from within the pine needles, thinking […]
“Honey, where’s the sponge?” “I think I saw it under the paintbrush!” “The paintbrush the baby was walking around with? Um, OK. And the coffee filters?” “Check between the washer and dryer. They might have fallen there. But more importantly, have you seen the girls’ shoes?” “Nothing’s more important than coffee. They’re on the box […]
Well, a year after I had my C-section, I’m done feeling weird about it. You know what? I’m not inadequate; I’m a magic trick.
My son has a fondness for Crocs. To be crystal clear, when I say “fondness,” I really mean “a whole hearted dedication so deep it would make Mario Batali genuflect in his honor.” Nary a shoelace nor a strip of Velcro has brushed against my son’s foot for longer than an hour since his little […]
When my husband and I started dating, he had the absolute worst college roommate — ever. John had no regard for cleanliness and hygiene. He never did the dishes, he bought new underwear instead of doing laundry, and he left food all around the house. I will never forget the time he ordered Chinese food and didn’t […]
Hey all you dads-to-be. How’s the pregnancy going? J/K, that was a trick question, because you’re not pregnant. If you were about to mention mood swings or designated drivers, though, this post is just for you. Father’s Day is coming up, and you’re going to be one any day now. Congrats! It’s the best, and […]
Last December, my parents took my siblings and our families to New York City, complete with tickets to the Broadway play “Something Rotten,” a funny parody on William Shakespeare. One of the show’s songs, “It’s Hard to Be the Bard,” has played in my head on repeat over the past five months, often with me inserting the […]
“What’s the thing that moms need that we can invent?” Every time I see my mother-in-law, there are a few things she’ll say without fail — and this is one. She’ll also remind me that “Aunt Ellen had the idea that diapers should be resealable.” Aunt Ellen could have been a millionaire, if only she […]
Today I will be as happy as my toddler. I will immediately assume that every gift — for any occasion — is for me. I will dance like nobody’s watching, twirl until I fall down, and throw my head back to laugh even when I don’t get the joke. Because I love laughing. Today I […]
“Being a mom is hard,” said nobody ever. Sometimes my mind is blown by how easy this whole “mothering” thing is. It’s like lying on a beach while some tanned, muscly, handsome man brings me fruity drinks. And the more children I have, the easier it gets! If I had known earlier that being a mom was […]
I avoided thinking about labor and delivery for the first six months of my pregnancy. I blissfully browsed Pinterest for nursery ideas, made lists of girl names, and daydreamed about bringing a little warm and shmushy bundle of joy into the world. Oh, the bliss of ignorance. I didn’t have a clue. Eventually, it was […]
When I was a kid, sick days were the best. A sniffle here, an upset stomach there — it didn’t matter. I milked those days for all they were worth. There was nothing quite like getting cozy on the couch and watching Wheel of Fortune and recorded VHS movies all day. My mom would bring […]
My family is looking for love. Real love. A family to settle down with for the long haul. Here’s how our personal ad reads: Us: Fun-loving family of five. Enjoy board games, building forts out of couch cushions, pancake breakfasts, and soccer at the park. Lots of noise, lots of laughter, occasional meltdowns. We clean […]