We talk about the anxiety and postpartum depression and mental health woes we moms experience. But we sometimes forget about the little ones we’ve created and their mental health. Did you know one in six U.S. children aged 2–8 years have a diagnosed mental, behavioral, or developmental disorder?
Some children may be born with mental health issues, and we don’t even know it. My son was diagnosed with ADHD at age 3. He’s about to turn 6 years old and I’ve learned so much in the last three years. It’s not just about hyperactivity. It’s also about behavior, emotions, and attention.
Many people — parents and children — don’t know the signs of various mental illnesses. So by looking at my son, for example, in school or at the grocery store, others sometimes think of him as a problem child. (Which is why we never went to mommy-and-me groups or had him in summer programs.) Even some care providers don’t know how to deal with children with ADD/ADHD or other mental illnesses. It can be very isolating.
I’m in a few Facebook groups for parents with ADHD children, and I’ve been astonished about things I have read. Some children end up with severe depression and other mental health illnesses from having issues in school and elsewhere — some even attempt hurting themselves. I had no idea at the age of 5 or 6 kids even thought about self-harm. ADHD can affect more than just attention and hyperactivity.
After recently moving to a new town in Massachusetts, my son had such a hard time transitioning, so his ADHD was in overdrive. It would break our hearts when he would come off the bus in tears because he was the new kid and no one wanted to play with him. That’s when his emotions would rise. This also created issues in school. We eventually opted to put him on medication, which has helped about 70% when it comes to hyperactivity. But he is also 5. When reaching out to his school counselor, she eased my mind and said exactly that. He’s a boy, and he’s 5! At 5 some kids still have hyperactivity and others can be calm as can be. He says he feels normal and that his brain isn’t going as crazy as it usually does.
As kids get older, they deal with the stress of school and making friends and so many other things. As parents, we can only be there a few hours a day (or sometimes even less). Moms and dads! Check on your little ones. Make sure they are OK. Even at age 4, they can have hard days just like we can. The difference is that we are better equipped to cope in healthy and productive ways. Our little ones simply don’t have those tools yet, and we need to do all we can to support them, set them up with the appropriate mental health resources, and show them our unconditional love.
If you are worried about a potential mental health illness in one of your children, please reach out to your child’s pediatrician to seek advice!
