Motherhood comes with a host of choices about what is best for you, your family, and your children. We at Boston Moms Blog are a diverse group of moms who want to embrace these choices instead of feel guilty or judged for them! Our “Parenting Perspectives” series is currently focused on the topic of comfort items. Our contributors will share their experiences with comfort items for their children.

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Shortly after my first son was born, a girlfriend of mine sent us a “welcome home” gift. It included a little blanket with a stuffed animal head attached to it. I didn’t give it a whole lot of thought and tucked it away. The next time we chatted I thanked her for the gift, and she raved about the “lovey” and how all her friends with kids swore by it.

The “lovey”?! This was the beginning…

A “lovey” is a security toy/blanket/stuffed animal/pacifier for a baby/toddler/child. My son’s was a monkey head attached to a little brown blanket. I thought, why not? I nestled the monkey underneath J’s arm in the car seat, and we tucked the monkey in with J once it was safe to have items in the crib. It didn’t take long before J was hooked. One monkey turned into having two in bed — every night.

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He wouldn’t go to sleep with out his “ah-ahs” (you know, like the noise a monkey makes). He wasn’t able to say the word “monkey,” but he made it clear what he wanted. The monkey has little tabs on the corners that he rubs between his index finger and his thumb. Apparently this is common with babies and toddlers… how did I not know this was a thing?! Over time he learned to say “monkey,” and somewhere in the mix we acquired a leopard as well. (And don’t make the mistake of calling it a tiger. He will call you out on it. Thanks “Wild Kratts.”) But you better believe that at bedtime those two monkeys are ready to go.

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As a parent, I love the lovey. It signals bedtime and calm down time to my busy toddler. He only has his monkey at bedtime and naptime, but if he wanted it other times we would be OK with it. We have extras that we keep at Nana and Papa’s  house, as well as a set of monkeys for traveling, but there is no fooling him. He knows the differences between all of them.

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The great thing about a lovey is it is a constant. He knows he will always have it during sleep, and he can count on it. We still have a baby monitor in his room, and he will often stir in the middle of the night, find his monkey, and roll back over to doze off. It is those times that I cannot thank the lovey enough. I know as he gets older the monkeys won’t be cool anymore and he will eventually leave them behind, but that just makes me cherish these nights even more.

When we had our second child we went the lovey route again, this time with a pink hippo. She is just as in love…

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Needless to say, my son is four years old, going on five, and he still sleeps with his monkeys every night. We’ll be leaving for a trip shortly, and you better believe I will be packing the monkeys to go with us — in our carry-on, that is. Can’t take any chances!


Parenting Perspectives: No Love for Lovies

Parenting Perspectives: My Kids Suck Their Fingers