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My husband and I recently moved to Boston from China. With me being pregnant, it was quite a struggle to persuade my mum that pregnant women in Boston receive regular checkups before delivery and that doctors will try their best to save my life if they ever need to. Don’t laugh — pregnant women are a highly protected species in China! Once pregnant, we suddenly become the most vulnerable and important people on earth.

In most cases in China, you would have your mother or mother-in-law living with you 24/7, to take care of you, of course. Making you three meals a day (or as many meals as you want), cleaning, carrying your bag while out — basically, treating you as a queen. She also keeps an eye on you and shares her experience from her or maybe her mum’s generations. Here are some of the things she may impose on you:

The low-tech life

Limit your computer and cellphone use and stay away from your printer, microwave, and Wi-Fi router, because the radiation from those devices could harm the baby. Anti-radiation clothes are almost a necessity for pregnant women — and prices range from 50RMB to 10,000RMB, which is roughly $7.50 to $1,515!

To eat or not to eat?

Got a craving for watermelon? How about papaya? Too bad! These foods are thought to increase the chance of miscarriage in China. Also, crab, coffee, tea, cold drinks, and ice cream are strictly forbidden for pregnant women. Different geographical areas have their own dos and don’ts, too. For example, brown sugar is considered very healthy for pregnant women in some areas, but it’s considered dangerous in other places because it boosts blood circulation. Many people give away their dogs or cats once pregnant.

Let go of your looks

You can forget about how you look. Why bother? You are not a woman anymore, you are a pregnant woman! No make-up, no perming or dying your hair, no nail polish, no perfume, no high heels.

Trust me, if you don’t follow these rules, it causes endless disputes and grief. I’ve been there, with my own mother. I can’t help wonder why our world changes so drastically when we got pregnant, especially when most of the rules we must follow seem ridiculous and unfounded. It’s hard to say whether we are being treated as royal or as prisoners. Is it because the older generation did it, and they turned out OK, so we have to? Is it a struggle of control? Or is it fear, because we are often told we would regret it later in our lives if we don’t follow these rules?

So, what dos and don’ts do you agree or disagree with here in America?